Smokey Bones

252 Montgomery Mall
North Wales, PA 19454
(267) 436-4630
Website

I was invited to the opening month of Smokey Bones, a BBQ place in a mall. As usual, I am interested in free food and BBQ (even if it is from a chain, I don't discriminate).

The place was very well put together. Tons of TV's, a huge horseshoe shaped bar, and good lighting. The first problem encountered was that it was really cold in there. I mean frigid. I am fat, so I can take the cold, but the staff and customers were all complaining about it. Not a big deal, still working out the heating kinks.

I hated the menu. It was like a cross between Applebee's and Famous Dave's. The font was all over the place, the menu itself was like a rubix cube. Order this, get that. Some things were more with certain fries etc. Not a fan.

Next up came the beer. They had a good selection, and I chose something to drink while I waited for my wings. It is a good thing. Because the wings almost never came. It was over 45 minutes from ordering to having to remind the bartender I was waiting on an app. It was not just me. I heard tables screaming at the servers, asking for managers, and generally causing a scene all over the restaurant. It was a Tuesday night at about 25% capacity. There should not be a staffing issue. The manager was all over the place. I have never seen more angry customers in one sitting. It was embarrassing to be a part of.

Finally- the wings came. I was all ready to load up my criticism cannon, but damn if these weren't some damn good wings. Actually, I was shocked with how good they were. Smoked after a dry rub and coated with a sweet glaze, I would definitely order these if I were stranded at the mall while someone was shopping. You can see how well rendered they were with the meat pulling back off of the bone. Delicious.

Next up was a pulled pork and hot sausage platter. The pork was good (though if you mess up pulled pork you should be shut down), however the Texas toast it was served with was a bit much.

They had the standards of BBQ sauce to choose from- vinegar, sweet, spicy, mustard.

The babyback ribs were part of my second combo order. They were again, well cooked. Tender, fat rendered out, and the collagen was nicely cooked down.

A good smoke on these ribs (check the pink ring).

The baked beans were okay, but nothing special.

A vat of mac and cheese was another decent side, but very greasy and heavy.

The slaw was okay, vinegar based with a sprinkle of celery seed.

The hotlinks just didn't do it for me. They were too coarsely ground, and had been sitting (like most of the food that night for everyone).

Just to top it off, the loaded fries. The fries themselves were undercooked, which led to a bad intro for the rest of the crowd. cheese and bacon alone can't make loaded fries good.

Below is an idea of where this place is located. Some guy was waving when the pic was snapped, so he was hit with the anonymous dot. Despite the food being better than I had expected, the service and poor management was hard to get over. It was the first time I have seen a number of different tables literally yelling at the manager. If they got that sorted out (remember, it was the first month open), it might be a passable place to eat at the mall.

Guest Post: Twin Anchors

1655 N. Sedgwick St.
Chicago, IL 60614
Website

Twin Anchors makes ribs. I'm sure there's other stuff on the menu, maybe even good stuff, but I'd never even bother. The sides are really good too but I don't even usually make it to them. It's like saying "hey, I can see that you're driving that really nice Ferrari there but care to take this Corvette for a spin?" Maybe even a Ferrari covered in bbq sauce. I can only dream.

I've tried to make ribs on my own but they're capable of some kind of magic there that I can't replicate. It's possible that they've had some time to work out the kinks since opening in 1932.

Aside from the ribs being cooked to perfection, the variety of available sauces really tops it off.

Here's a breakdown of each:

Original - A fantastic base-line mild, tomato based sauce. This one was good enough to hold up on its own for the first nearly 50 years of the TA being around.
Zesty - Introduced 30 years ago, it's a tangy twist on the original.
Prohibition - The newest edition, a fiery variant with a lingering burn. I buy a bottle of this stuff to take home every time I visit.

The bottom line is that this place does ribs right. If it was good enough for Sinatra, it's good enough for you. Next time you're in the windy city make the effort. But show up early. The line stretches down the street on most nights.

Fette Sau

1208 Frankford Avenue
Philadelphia, PA 19125
(215) 391-4888
Website

The long awaited Philadelphia transplant of the infamous Brooklyn BBQ joint Fette Sau (meaning fat pig in German) has finally arrived. This location happens to be next door to Frankford Hall, and also happens to be owned by the one-and-only Starr Restaurant Group.

Although I traditionally try not to review on opening night (not to mention I had already eaten a dinner full of $1 tacos hours earlier), I couldn’t help but wander down for a beer and some meat. And sides. And potato rolls.

The interior is incredibly spacious, with a mixture of industrial-meets-BBQ shack decor that suits the hipster capital in which it is located nicely.

Menu items are priced by the pound, and although not cheap, there are ways to eat well for a reasonable price. The more affordable sides are not to be missed.

When you walk up, you are greeted by a case filled with various meats. Be warned, the short rib is served at a minimum of a half pound, because you get a bone with every order, which puts it around $15. That being said, it’s probably the best fifteen bucks you have spent in a while.

Brisket and pork belly are sliced to order behind the counter.

As I was not that hungry, I went with a half pound of pulled pork, a quarter pound of pork belly (3 slices), two potato rolls ($.35 a piece), a small potato salad, and a small order of half sour pickles.

The pork was delicious. Slow-smoked with much of the fat rendered out, it had a nice smoky flavor. Pieces of bark were interlaced with the meat, which SHOULD be the norm at any self respecting BBQ joint.

Now truth be told, I am very demanding of my BBQ, as it is one of my specialties, and nothing in Philly REALLY sparks my interest. This place was doing the trick. I know there will be backlash of, "but it’s Starrr... bleh, blah, blah, its too expensive, its too fancy, bleh," etc. Well the thing is, really good BBQ isn’t cheap. It takes a LONG time to do it correctly, and these man hours add up. So shut up, and enjoy the food without coming in already prejudiced against it.

The pork belly was delicious as well, with a glistening vein of rich pork fat, a beautiful crust, and a perfect deep pink smoke ring. It literally melted when it hit my tongue. Let's just say I was a BIG fan of the pork products.

The potato salad was great, specked with whole mustard seed, and coated with a creamy, slightly tangy, light (enough) dressing.

I have an extreme liking of half sours, and these were no exception. Especially when sliced into coins and piled on top of a pulled pork sandwich of my own design. Three sauces were offered, one vinegar (good), one traditional (also good), and one chipotle
(terrible). Stick with the two originals and you can’t go wrong. Did I mention they serve Martin's potato rolls for $.35 a piece? Also a must have in this scenario.

Now, as can be expected, I went heavy on the pork, but a friend that accompanied me went heavy on the beef. Which was just fine with me. We were interested in trying a bit of everything.

The short ribs, while expensive, were absolutely delicious, a “must order” in my opinion. A little goes a long way with this over the top, smoke and fat rich meatstravaganza. Again, the bark was terrific, and the meat glistened with rendered deliciousness.

Just look at this tender pull-apart-ability.

The brisket was pretty damn good too, with a rich, velvety line of fat running throughout. Not the most tender rendition I have had.

The burnt ends baked beans were among the best I have ever had. If you order nothing else, you must get these. Smokey, rich, loaded with beef, the complexity is only matched by the richness. This is a meal unto itself.

Cold broccoli salad was a red pepper flecked, vinegar-based side that was a take it or leave proposition.

After you order your food at the counter, but before you retire to the seat-yourself picnic style arrangements around the restaurant, you can stop and grab a beer or bourbon at the bar, which is highly recommended, not required. Local microbrews are on tap, all at $6/pint and served in ball jars. < Hipster heaven.

The art/interior decor itself is interesting, and not overly contrived. It would obviously be better if it had been here for decades, but with any luck it will.

This is going to be the kind of place people love or hate. Or love to hate. Or hate to love. But for me, it’s probably my favorite BBQ I have experienced to date at a restaurant in the city, and I will continue to stuff my face with various meat products and over indulgent sides and love every minute of it.